Round-a-bout ...

I'm out of decent shampoo and conditioner.

I realize that might not sound like a big issue to most, but it is to me. Somewhere around the age of 27, my hair went from straight and smooth to frizzy and curly. And still just as thick as ever. And cheap shampoos and conditioners only accentuate the frizzy, making me look like a very tall troll doll (very tall compared to the doll itself .. I'm not tall). I know because that's what I've been using for the last few weeks.

Earth shattering news, eh?

Patrick and I were watching yet another news blurb about the economy and the mad mess that's happening. My question is ... what does that to mean to those of us who already don't have money? I mean ... yeah it sucks hard for those that invest their money and are now losing it hand over fist, but we've never had enough extra to play the stocks game. So we're not really losing out on this whole thing.

Oh except for that whole "here, pay more taxes to help us take care of other people's fucks ups" thing.

This is why I'm on the cusp of empathy for those stuck in the middle - the ones who took out unreal loans to buy a home at an unreal price and the banks that financed it. Yes, the banks had a responsibility to explain the fine print to the buyer. But, to me, the buyer had the greater responsibility to friggin ask and make sure they could pay their mortgage.

It's what we did when we bought our home almost a year ago. Our payment is fixed, includes our home owner's insurance and taxes, and it's the same every month regardless of what happens to the interest rates.

Outside of taxes, the part that also affects us is that companies are laying people off left and right. Which means our local job market is now flooded with applicants, all vying for the same handful of jobs.

That affects us in the sense that there are far fewer listings each week and I'm still on unemployment. And while I can pay my base bills with the money, please don't ask me to buy much food because there's not much money left when I'm done paying some bills. Speaking of food (before someone asks) - I don't qualify for food stamps because 1) I don't have a job and you have to have a job to get them and 2) I make too much on unemployment to qualify. How fucked up is that?

And don't even get me started on stress.

I have learned, though, exactly how much money I don't need to spend on extras. Really. I went from making a pretty good salary and rarely having anything left to bringing in the bottom of the barrel and actually having a small bit left every week. Why? Because I can't do and buy all of the things I use to. I've learned to micromanage most (I say most because sometimes you explode and drive through McD's for a fish sandwich) of my finances.

And with gas prices the way they are, it's a lot less tempting to drive someplace where you might spend a bit of money that you really can't afford to spend. I find it much easier to say "I can't afford to buy / do anything and I'm not going to waste the gas to get there only to not spend the money and be doubly pissed when I leave because I couldn't buy / do anything and now I've wasted a 1/4 tank of gas".

So it's not all bad. It's really shown me how much money can be wasted on unnecessary extras.

Like good shampoo and conditioner.

Which I won't buy because it's now too expensive and I need to make sure I keep as much money in my account as is possible in case I need an extra $50 (cuz that's about how much I get left over after paying bills and it has to last a couple of weeks).

So I'll be the giant troll doll for a bit longer.